moodshifter | Alice Cullen | Natasha Romanova

"I see." Natasha's eyes are trained on Jasper directly as he speaks, her voice somewhat distant with a distraction that can't be placed visually. The way that he stands there, briefing her as if the soldier in him never faded... Natasha realizes what's happening a moment after, and she stands up a little straighter with a raised eyebrow when she does.

"I like it when you do that." She gestures to him, "that thing you do where you brief me instead of simply telling me something. It's probably weird that that turns me on, right? Yeah, it's probably weird." And yet she has no qualms about letting him know about it, or letting him feel it, the hint of arousal that his outward strength sets in her.

She turns to face him, head tilting to the side to let her hair fall over her shoulder, and she gives him a slow once over that she doesn't attempt to hide before her eyes fall back onto his. That sharp intensity in his stare... yes. That's what does it. "You don't like them very much, do you?" She smirks a little, and the look in her eye has changed as well. It's something more focused... almost predatory.

"I don't think we'll have to worry about them. I've killed wolves, I've killed bears. If they step out of line, we can handle it."

He's focused on assessing her as an ally against the wolves and passing her the straight facts, and her reaction takes him entirely by surprise, even more so when he can feel the truth of her words in that little ribbon of shimmering heat that's wrapping through her now. Alice has felt that way about him, so had Maria, but he's never, not once, had someone react to his decidedly military manner of speech in such a way. It surprises him how much he immediately enjoys it. It's another way they're similar, he thinks, another reason this might really work.

"No ma'am," he says with a slow smile, "I do not much care for them. Acting against them would only turn the rest of the tribe against us, or I'd've done it already. Which," he glances outside, toward the woods where Alice is no doubt running through the branches for the joy of running, "we should keep to ourselves, if you'd be so good. As far as the other, I certainly can't speak for what's weird or not, but I'm far more in favor of it."

"Already trusting me with secrets?" Her eyebrow lifts with interest once more, and the crooked smirk she wears is a tell tale sign that she's hiding something, although Jasper wouldn't know that just yet. He'll learn. The way that he stands there smiling at her just makes that heat in her build more, but Natasha keeps it behind her wall, knowing all too well that Jasper is much too polite to go digging around there to see what he can find. Manners won't get him far when it comes to Natasha, but he'll learn that too.

"My lips are sealed. But it's good to know." She gives her head a little tilt to the side with a facial shrug, and she holds the bags that she's gathered in one hand before she starts to head to the trash. "And the fact that you're in favor, that's also good to know." She waits. Natasha gets closer to him, still keeping a foot or so between them as she passes him on the way to the trash, but as soon as she's in close proximity her walls come down with surprising abruptness and she unleashes the warm arousal he set in her all at once for him to feel as suddenly as he had felt her guilt the first night that she showed up at the cabin.

There's no pause in her stride as she throws out the plastic and moves to the fridge to get something together for her dinner. "What did I tell you about calling me that?" She continues to search what she had just purchased, as if trying to make up her mind. "It's good to know. If they cause problems for us in the future, you'll have an ally. That stays between us as well."

Edited 2017-03-05 23:17 (UTC)

His reaction is much the same as the first time he'd been hit with a sharp, powerful wave of feeling from her, but this time he doesn't cringe away like he's been slapped, he finds himself leaning into it, chasing the scent, the flavor of it, he can smell it on her, and it takes a concerted, visible effort for him to keep his feet planted and his hands resting on the counter behind him, and not to follow her across the kitchen and back.

He actually needs to wet his lips before he can answer, she's made his throat so dry, but this isn't the thirst, this is a separate kind of hunger, and he's starting to understand how Edward had been able to make those distinctions. It isn't something that can be understood until it happens. "You said you were a lot of things, but 'ma'am' wasn't one of them," he says slowly, drawing out the drawl because he knows for a fact that she likes it, "but then, you weren't always one to be a stickler for the rules. I don't see why I should be. Especially if you're going to insist on making use of my abilities like that."

"I don't know what you're talking about." She says it so dismissively that it's almost convincing, but she closes the refrigerator door with a bottle of water in her hand instead of making a decision on what she should eat and turns to reveal a knowing smile. She moves closer to him, slowly to give him a chance to back up if he has to, and Natasha leans against the counter a foot or so away from him as she twists the cap off of it. She sees what he's doing; the way that he accentuates his drawl isn't lost on her, and she knows flirting when she sees it. Even when it comes from old fashioned southern gentlemen.

"I would never use your abilities against you," she promises, obviously falsely as she keeps her walls down. It's almost as if she can concentrate on one emotion and strengthen it, because for Natasha, she almost can. Her emotional focus was something that was trained into her at a young age, and Natasha knows how to narrow in on one thing to feed off of it. Now, she's letting him feed off of it instead, and the sensation of want that's in her practically surrounds her like a particularly potent aura. Outwardly she's fine; she pauses to sip her water.

"And, my rules are different." The clarification comes with a grin, and she stares up at him with an intensity that may be strengthened by the still-there makeup of her earlier gathering of intel. "You have to follow my rules. There's repercussions if you break them." She practically bats her eyes at him as she looks up at him through thick lashes. "I'll let you off with a warning this time but in the future, remember that you've been warned. You know how to take a direct order, don't you, soldier?"

His skeptical raised brow indicates that it was not in fact convincing whatsoever, he hardly needs the ability to read moods to know that much by now. He doesn't back up, doesn't feel the need to, but he notices the careful approach and it warms him a bit that she's taking into consideration his potential discomfort, even as she aims to discomfit him. It's an odd duality, but strangely it makes him trust her that much more. She knows the difference between limits and hard limits.

He shifts to lean an elbow against the counter, turning to face her and incidentally lowering himself closer to her height. He's almost lightheaded, something close to drunk on the flavor of her right now, but he's in no danger of anything worse than that, and neither is she. The thirst isn't rising. "Ain't been a soldier in many a year," he says thoughtfully. "Might've forgotten that little detail. I'm meant to be a man of peace now. Vegetarian and all."

He blinks slowly at her, body language at ease in a way it hasn't quite managed before when she's been this close. It's inviting, and if he still fed on humans, it might be too inviting, but he doesn't. He could never be this relaxed around other humans. It's just her.

The laugh that Natasha gives is a little more playful than her usual one, rare and genuine and almost melodic in its own quiet and contained way. He seems comfortable and Natasha is highly aware of that even if she's not showing it; she's watching his mannerisms closely. Perhaps if she were more reckless or careless of his feelings she wouldn't be so concerned, but this isn't about her safety; it's about his comfort. She knows that he doesn't like having to run off every time his hunger hits him too strong, and she knows that there's a sense of guilt in that even though he's doing it to protect her. Jasper doesn't keep his distance because he wants to, perhaps not even because he has to, but because he believes that he has to in order to keep everything safe. He does that for her, and she has no plans on showing anything but gratitude for that.

"I think someone is forgetting who he's speaking to." It's almost singsong when she speaks, and she briefly catches the corner of her lip between her teeth before releasing it and taking a few inches closer. Then she stops. She's testing his boundaries but not to push him, she's doing it for both of them. She needs to know how close she can get without making him too uncomfortable, and he needs to know how close she can get without having to freeze up and avoid breathing. It's something that they need to work on together, and a part of her wants to show him that it doesn't have to be tense and uncertain with little words on a balcony outside. They can figure it out together, because that's why she's here in the first place.

"A man never stops being a soldier. He just chooses different battles to fight." She pauses, staring up at him with a look that matches the heat radiating off of her, and Natasha moves slowly as she reaches out. Not to warn him; she knows he can move away fast if he needs to. She moves slowly so that she can read him, and know that she needs to pull away if she senses any discomfort so he doesn't have to. With slow movements she manages to get all the way to his shirt, and with a nimble touch she unfastens the top button for him before placing her hand on his chest and then letting it fall away.

"Not too peaceful, I hope." Eyes widen and they're paired with a faux pout, bottom lip sticking out as her voice takes a sorrowful turn. "Wouldn't be much fun if I was the only one looking for something a little more exciting than peace."

He laughs, and even ducks his head a little, caught out in the lie. "Can't pull one over on you, I can see that," he murmurs, and watches her as she comes closer. This is as close as they've ever been, even a bit closer than the first night they'd arrived, before Alice had come back, and while her scent still surrounds him and the thirst is still there, he's somewhat separated from it. Whether it's familiarity or just a streak of stubborn willpower he hadn't needed until now, he's still at ease.

Her slow isn't a timid slow, it's a careful slow, it's careful because of him, his limits, he thinks as her fingers tease a button open and slide hotly against his skin. There's a hesitation to her again, but it's the hesitation of exploration, because they're walking those limits again, finding the borders, and it's them together now.

When her hand falls away, he catches it, quicker than maybe he ought to move, but cradling it carefully as he lifts it and sets her hand against his cheek again. "I think we're winning this particular battle," he whispers as he turns his head just enough to brush his lips against her palm. There's an urge to bite that surges up, but he fights it back down, it doesn't take much effort at all, he doesn't even need to pause. "Winning is always more exciting than peace."

Her walls are already down now, everything that she felt the need to hide earlier that day long forgotten in favor of the moment that he has her in, and he does have her in it. Natasha has been through enough where she was thoroughly convinced that nobody would ever be able to instill anything new in her; she's felt everything, because with the life that she's lived in such a short amount of time, how couldn't she? He's already proven her wrong in that, instilling a pleasant little flutter in her that she's either never experienced or never allowed herself to, and it's... nice. Being around Jasper is nice. She doesn't think she's ever been able to feel like that around another person before.

He can feel the little spark of surprise in her when he grabs her hand, and she isn't certain what he's doing exactly until he lifts it to touch the side of his face again, and it brings a smile to her lips. But then he goes and turns his head, pressing a soft kiss against the palm of her hand, and Natasha swears she can feel the pleasant chill of it dancing up her arm. There's another sudden and unexpected wave of emotion, this time not from her own manipulation as it surprises her just as much as it probably surprises him. It's pure, and warm... something she's certain that she's never felt before, but it goes straight to her head and makes her pleasantly dizzy. Affection. A wave of affection for the man standing with her comes from nowhere, and instead of trying to hide it Natasha bathes in it, because it's easily one of the nicest things she's ever felt.

"I think so, too." She sounds slightly breathless, but her smile is bright and reflects everything that he gives her. She's proud of him, its strong and potent, and that mixes with the affection which mixes in with the arousal and...

Jasper makes her feel simply wonderful.

She blushes a little with she realizes it but she doesn't pull away like she's always had to when she felt like she was getting too close to someone. Instead she basks in it, resting her hand against his face and moving it to brush his long hair from his eyes so she can see them more clearly. Instead of keeping her hand still this time she traces it against his skin, fingertips running slowly down his jaw and back up to trace his cheekbone; testing, making sure that they're still both okay.

"Good." Her smile never fades, but it seems to brighten once more. "I'm glad we agree on something else, because I don't lose."

Jasper has stopped moving again, but it isn't because the danger is mounting, it's because he's savoring everything he can feel coming off her in a way he's really only done with Alice before. He hasn't even noticed how still he's gone, but there's no tension in his shoulders the way there was before when he'd needed to stop moving to avoid an unfortunate incident. She's basking in everything she's feeling and so is he.

"I wouldn't want you to need to start over something so trifling," he murmurs, and then stirs again to run the tip of his nose against her fingers before making another strategic advance in the battle against his thirst and reaching out to set his hands against her waist, and pulls her carefully in to lean up against him. This is the biggest challenge thus far, her scent everywhere, her warmth brighter than sunlight, and he's frowning just a bit as he watches himself as closely as he can.

"I'm very pleased you made the decision to stay," he says after a moment, quiet and steady, as he realizes he still has a strong hold on the thirst. Perhaps that's the secret, he thinks, just keeping it in iron grips, and that's the part that gets easier with time. She's worth doing that for.

He gets another quiet laugh out of her, fluttery and light and somehow completely contradictory to her as a person and yet perfectly fitting to who she is with him. "Always the gentleman," she teases lightly, and there's another lurch of approval and pride when she feels his hands on her waist to drag her in slowly. He's cool, body hard like stone, and it's a nice contradiction to the heat she feels coursing through her simply from his touch. Natasha is no stranger to physical contact with men, she's used it as a weapon more times than she can count and yet it's different with Jasper. Knowing that she has to work for it - that they both do - makes it feel like a prize instead of a chore, and she can't remember the last time she enjoyed being in someone's arms.

She leans against him, working on controlling herself as well to make sure that she doesn't take things too fast too fast, and when she sees that soft frown on his face her fingers slowly trace back up until she brushes her thumb against the corner of his mouth. "None of that," she insists quietly with an encouraging smile. "We're doing well." 'We'. Not 'he', because he's not alone in this and she doesn't want him to ever feel as if he is. She wants to be his partner; not his obstacle.

"As opposed to what, disappearing?" With a small shrug Natasha makes her next move, her free hand slipping down to continue unbuttoning his shirt, and she gets it unfastened to the middle so that she can lay her hand flat on his chest and hold it there. He really is cold, but it's strangely enjoyable and after giving him a moment to adjust she leans forward to press a soft, affectionate kiss to his collarbone. "No," she continues finally, and Natasha's hand leaves his face only so that she can wrap an arm around his waist in return and lean in to rest her cheek against his bare chest. In that moment her eyes close, and she breathes him in... it's nice when it's the other way around. Being surrounded by him, his scent and his touch, makes her feel a strange sense of calm safety. She can't remember the last time that she felt safe, but Jasper is filled with a lot of 'firsts' for her, each one more pleasing than the last.

She watches her own finger trace slow patterns against his skin. "I'm not going anywhere. I don't want to be anywhere but right here."

He lets his fingers link behind Natasha's back, the same way he'd held Alice after she'd first arrived, and tips his head enough to watch the movement of Natasha's hand against the buttons of his shirt, and then his skin. It feels like a branding iron, but he leans into it, a little fascinated by the heat of her skin. When he can't watch any longer, he rests his cheek against her head.

"I was trying to prepare myself for it," he murmurs into her hair. "I was trying to be ready, in those first days even before I told you about Alice's vision, to come back to the cabin after an excursion and find it empty. The relief I felt every time it didn't happen, that's when I knew it'd hurt if it did."

After a moment, he raises his head and turns to glance at the kitchen windows. "Alice is on her way back," he adds, without loosening his arms or trying to step back. He can pick up the tendrils of her feelings, even this far out: happiness, excitement, that satisfaction she gets when she's had luck shopping. How far had she gone?

"Well don't." She makes it sound simple and she knows that, but for Natasha it is. She falls silent for a moment, letting it linger and simply resting in the peace that she's found with the new boundary they've crossed, and another emotion trickles in; anxiety. She's nervous, but she doesn't hide that from him. Not after he's already made so much effort for her today.

"SHIELD wasn't my job, it was my life. Every morning I woke up I wouldn't know where my mission was going to lead me, but it was never my decision. My life has always been that way, even before I joined the agency." Another pause, her fingers still brushing softly against cool skin. "Before SHIELD I was a part of something else, darker. Or at least, back then we were more obvious about our intentions..." Natasha shakes her head. "The point is, since I was eight I never made a decision of my own. When I woke up, when I slept... when I ate, when I read, it was all assigned for me. The day I showed up at the cabin, that was the first choice I've made in my life and even then, it didn't feel like much of a choice after everything that had happened. It feels different now. I've ended a chapter in my life that I don't want to look back on anymore."

She feels his head move and his comment leaves her smiling, and huffing a quiet laugh against his skin before she moves as well to look up at him. "Afraid that she's going to find her husband in the arms of another woman?" She raises an eyebrow, challenging and teasing, and instead of pulling away Natasha reaches up with both of her hands to take his face between them. She pulls him down slowly, because he's simply too damn tall in her opinion, and she stops once to read his eyes before continuing so that she can press a soft kiss against his cheek.

Her mouth moves higher, full lips brushing against his ear with a whisper. "Ty moya sleduyushchaya glava, Dzhasper Uitlok Kheyl. Ty i Elis - moy pervyy vybor."

She's taking a risk, but it's a calculated one, they both know it, and somehow that helps. It helps to have a we, it always has. Alice keeps him balanced, she moves through the world in a dance and brings him along with her, but he and Natasha, if left to themselves, they both look at the world with the eye of a fighter, a strategist who intends to win, not seek out a truce or a draw. It's been a long time since he's had someone like that to lean on, and Maria had never had him on an even footing with herself.

His eyes are still clear when she checks them, there's still no danger that he'll need to disappear on her. He'll do his best not to disappear on her for the rest of his life. "My gordimsya etoy chest'yu, Natal'ya," he murmurs, reaching up to set a chilly hand against hers on his cheek. "Somehow I don't think she'll mind."

Another laugh, and this time one that's somewhat self depreciating. Honor... there's no honor in having Natasha's affection, that would suggest that it's something to be coveted and she knows for a fact that it isn't the case. He doesn't know enough about her yet to realize as much, but he will. Maybe they'll want to change their minds after that happens, but they're putting a lot of faith in her and Natasha isn't blind to that. She has to put faith in them as well.

"I don't think she will either," Natasha tilts her head into his touch as her eyes flutter shut with a soft smile on her lips. "I think," she turns her head to press a warm kiss to his palm, "knowing her," another to his fingertips, "she's going to wait until we're not wrapped around each other to come in, if she feels like she's interrupting something." The last kiss falls on the inside of his wrist before her eyes move back up to his face.

"Which means you should probably let go, handsome."

It's easy to know the perfect moment to walk in when you shamelessly eavesdrop. Laden with bags from several stores in Vancouver, Alice walks along the thick branch outside the living room window and leans down to peek in, beaming, at the two of them wrapped up in each other in the kitchen. It's astonishing how comfortable Jasper is, even to Alice, who's already seen how good they are together in the future. But it's not the same as seeing it happening before her very eyes.

"Hey you two," she says as she hops down, before Jasper's really acted on that suggestion to let Natasha go. She sets all the bags down and zips over to them both before they can separate and puts her arms around each of their shoulders, leaning up to peck Jasper's cheek, then leaning over—so nice to have someone her height—to peck Natasha's, and then rests her head on Jasper's shoulder, next to his half-open shirt, which makes her giggle.

"Looks like you had fun while I was gone. It took you long enough. I had to go all the way to Vancouver to make sure you had enough time." But her fingers play lightly at the nape of Jasper's neck, and Natasha's, and she's brimming with pride.

Her attention is caught before Alice speaks, the light rustle of leaves from the branch she's walking on inconstant with the soft breeze and making her look. She smiles warmly at Alice, as if to try and convey her own pride for Jasper in one look, and the kiss on her cheek brings a pleasant warmth to Nat's face that she's sure she enjoys a little too much. Jasper and Alice are unlike anybody who she's ever met before, and she's almost certain that it's one of the reasons she enjoys them so much.

"We're in no rush," she points out, smiling up at Jasper once more before giving Alice a little wink that silently says 'watch this'. Then Natasha leans up, kissing Jasper on the jaw with soft lips before finally unwrapping her arm around him and moving her other hand to rebutton his shirt. Her fingers pause before she does.

"It looks better this way." She decides aloud before leaving his shirt the way it is, and when she lets go of him she does so to take Alice's hands in both of her own. Jasper isn't the only one here that she's making an effort for, after all. "Come on, show me what you bought in Vancouver. Show off, by the way." She looks at Alice with accusing eyes before they move to Jasper. "Both of you are show offs. I just want to clarify that I see it, and I know, and I'm going to call you out on it. Come on." She grins, tugging Alice toward her a little so she can return the affectionate kiss to her cheek. She's trying. She truly is.

"I'm going to make myself food, keep me company."

Alice's eyes widen a little in surprise as Natasha kisses Jasper's jaw and he doesn't tighten, he doesn't even go still, he doesn't even need to stop breathing. She knows Jasper can feel just how deep and how strong her swell of pride is, and she knows he knows there isn't even a drop of jealousy mixed into it. She's good for him. She'll be good for both of them, and they'll be good for her. Alice is certain of it, and how could she be angry about something like that?

Alice skates a finger along his cheek before she lets Natasha lead her away, leaning into the cheek-kiss she gets in return. Natasha still makes her a little nervous. Not afraid exactly, that isn't it, but Alice still doesn't know how they're going to get to the happy scenes she's seen in her visions. Natasha and Jasper have so much in common. They have a connection already, and she doesn't have that yet. She will, she trusts in that, but...nervous.

Out of the corner of her eye, she watches Jasper take a few silent steps back toward the window. He doesn't need to hunt, he isn't going far, but she catches a flash of him coming back as the sun is setting. He's picked up on that nervousness of hers, she thinks, and it's possible Natasha feels the same, he's giving them time together.

"I got you something," she says brightly, and almost skips to her pile of bags to dig through and find a very small one, a black bag with a black jewelry box inside it, and inside that, a pair of ruby and black diamond earrings. "I was walking past the window and they made me think of you."

She doesn't see Jasper leave, too wrapped up in her concentration on Alice to keep tabs on him. She's made strides with him, but Alice is a different story. They've just met, and although it feels as if she knows her already from all of the stories that Jasper has told Natasha, she knows full well that it isn't enough. There's a connection that needs to be formed between them, and connecting with people is something that Natasha is a master at unless it's in a true and personal level. It's hard for her to be who she is, instead of the person she thinks Alice wants her to be. But she'll try.

She takes the bag and gives Alice a curious glance before opening it, pulling out the box only to remove the lid and see the earrings inside. It's easy to notice that upon first glance they're real; Natasha knows her jewelry. The rubies alone probably cost a pretty penny, but it's the black diamond that makes her eyes widen and look up at Alice as if she isn't certain whether she had meant to hand her a different bag.

"You got these for me?" She needs confirmation. This isn't the time she's held expensive jewelry, but it is the first time it's been handed to Natasha, not Natalie or Sophia or any other mask she's had to put on. She can't help but give a shy smile, uncertain as to whether or not she should even accept them, but after a few moments she removes them from their box and she slips them into her ears before leaning forward and pressing another soft kiss to Alice's cheek, this time with a follow up one to the tip of her nose.

"These are beautiful. Thank you, Alice." She brushes the small woman's hair behind her ear with a tender touch, and she gives her a wink. "They're my colors. How did you know?"

After a few moments of hesitation and nervously chewing on the corner of her lip, Natasha turns to grab the cookware she's going to need. "Jasper and I were talking." She smiles to herself. "...We think that it's best to stay here. Let the family come to us instead, save some time for the three of us to be alone together, you were right."

"I had a hunch," Alice says with a secretive smile. She's seen the Black Widow in her, well, her work uniform? Is that what it's called? Red and black just seems to be a theme for her, and Alice just doesn't hesitate when it comes to appropriate gifts, she never has.

She can't blush, but Natasha makes her almost wish she could. She's like Jasper that way, Alice thinks with a happy smile as Natasha turns to start cooking and she moves to a counter out of the way and goes to hop onto it and stumbles with the force of the slew of images that suddenly slam through her—

—the crunch of frozen pine needles beneath boots, the swish of black red-lined cloaks, a row of hoods drifting too fast through the snowy forest, Aro's bared-teeth smile, the ice in Caius' eyes, Marcus' indifferent sigh, the rest of the family arrayed on either side of Alice and Natasha standing shoulder to shoulder to separate Jasper from Felix the executioner, Natasha's red eyes...red?—

"—oh," she gasps, gripping the counter so hard the granite nearly cracks. A thump outside is Jasper reappearing and blurring to her side, watching her with that sharp intensity. He doesn't even need to ask what she'd seen before she's reaching one hand for him, one hand out for Natasha. "The Volturi," she blurts, looking back to Jasper, horrified. "They're coming after...after you."

Natasha just barely notices the stumble before she's already hurrying to Alice's side, and before she can ask what's wrong Jasper is back in a blur of color. Her hands are on Alice's arm and shoulder as if she's catching her to keep her steady, and Natasha's wide-eyed stare flickers between Alice and Jasper when the woman finally speaks. She must have had a vision, but everything that she says...

"The what?" She looks at Alice before looking back up at Jasper, and her impatience seems to come through for the first time. Barely a second passes by before she's pushing again in annoyance. "What the hell are the Volturi, they're after who, him? Jasper?" She looks up at Jasper now, brow furrowed in concern. "Why is somebody after you?" She doesn't like being in the dark... Natasha is always the first to know something, that's her job. She's not working anymore, but it's become a part of her personality, now. "Somebody explain to me what that sentence means, that'd be great."

One hand goes onto Natasha's shoulder, and it takes more effort to avoid using his abilities to quell her impatience, but he knows that's not to be done, not to her. "The Volturi are as near to leaders as the vampire world has," he says softly, eyes still on Alice as she leans against the counter, recovering her equilibrium. Whatever she'd seen, it's rattled her badly. "They're enforcers of the few laws we have. Nearly all of them revolving around keeping the existence of vampires a secret. We've had...dealings...with them in the past. Come out alive, so far. It's been a decade since they last...Alice, what did you see?"

His eyes drop to Alice's pocket as her phone starts ringing. "That'll be Edward," he says absently as Alice pulls her hand from his to fumble for it. "He always picks up on it when Alice has a vision that strong. I don't know why the Volturi would be after me, but at one point they were awfully intent on Alice and Edward joining them. Aro likes collecting people with abilities. But they're, oddly enough, honorable in their way. We've broken no laws, not even bent any, so they've left us in peace."

The simple hand on her shoulder seems to calm her, and for a moment Natasha almost gets angry when she thinks that Jasper has purposefully forced her to calm herself. Then she realizes that, no, it's just because he's there and she finds that comforting, and how disgusting is that?

Alice looks shaken and Natasha moves before she really thinks, leaning further into the woman and sitting up on the counter with her to gently pull Alice into her and hold her steady for a moment, fingers running through her hair as Natasha's eyes are on Jasper. She only loosens her grip when Alice reaches for her phone, but she doesn't pull away.

"Keeping the existence of vampires a secret." Natasha says aloud, her heart leaping into her throat. "So a leaked video of one breaking out of his constraints in a top secret facility, that would probably put a damper on what they consider as 'secret', wouldn't it?" Vampire leaders... Natasha wouldn't even know where to begin when it comes to protecting him from something like that, and for the first time she feels horribly useless. That simply won't do.

"What do they do to people they feel have broken their law?"

Alice is talking rapidly to Edward, not so quickly that Natasha probably can't follow, but certainly faster than usual. She'd seen all three of the Volturi but only their four most trusted aides, Jane and Alec and Felix and Dmitri, no vast array of followers like they'd brought along ten years ago. It's winter in her vision, a thick crust of old snow. They're not coming this minute, and he relaxes visibly at that, able to turn more of his attention to Natasha.

"It would, at that," he says darkly. "And any research on that 'alternate species' that happened to be released, they wouldn't look too kindly on that either." He can hear Edward on the other end of the phone, and even Carlisle in the background, saying they'll wrap up their lives in Calgary and start back toward Forks as soon as they can.

"It's a capital crime," he says briskly, falling back into the reassurance of that military briefing they both find so comfortable. "To bring attention, to make a scene. We could argue until we ran out of air, and I'm sure Carlisle will, that I was held against my will and my escape was my only survival, but that won't change the letter of their law."

"Well fuck their law." She says it simply, eyes moving back to Alice as she barely hears voices on the other end of the phone, and Natasha's obviously deep in thought as her eyes move to the window. This is her fault for the leak in the first place, and even if Jasper or Alice won't blame her for that or say that they understood why it was necessary, she knows it to be the case.

Every decision that she's made in the past few weeks has been painfully reckless and Natasha knows it, but who can blame her? She's never made choices for herself before, perhaps she's getting a little high off of the simply ability to do so. Perhaps she doesn't consider her own mortality something to be coveted, or maybe Natasha has seen into a world where being just her will never truly be enough.

It's a world filled with gods and monsters, aliens and magic and it's all so far over her head that she feels as if she's drowning in it. Her choice to come here, it wasn't a choice to run. She's still going to make up for the bad of her past, but now she's going to do it on her terms, and why can't she have both? Why can't she have redemption and love? She doesn't deserve it, but since when has Natasha Romanoff let the world tell her exactly what she deserves.

"I'm useless like this." Her eyes move to Jasper suddenly as if she's made her mind, a toil of emotions twisting around within her until she finally settles on steel certainty, fortified with determination. "You'll have to change me before they get here." Simple. As if offering a forgotten umbrella in the rain.

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